It’s rare that I listen to podcast episodes the day or even the month they drop. Case in point, just three days ago I listened to a Christmas-themed podcast featuring Aarti Sequiera. I loved the entirety of it even if it is closer to Saint Patrick’s Day. In fact, I was inspired by it so much that I am writing an article because of it.
You see, this episode was about giving, and in it, Aarti mentioned how she struggles with giving when it changes how others view her.
And, I realized I could relate to this.
Several of my friends are currently going through difficult times and I want to give something to help them, but I’m too hesitant to follow through. Of course, I can list all the reasons why I can’t do anything for them.
- I don’t know what to do
- I don’t have the resources, aka, money
- I might give them something they don’t want or need and then it’s wasted
- I’m not clever enough to do something helpful
You get the idea. You probably feel that way too when it comes to giving. Or, perhaps you don’t. I’m glad there are people who give without reservation; the world needs more people like you.
She’s NOT All That
Throughout my life, though, I have greatly benefitted from the kindness of others, and honestly, it was usually a great sacrifice for them. Their sacrificial kindnesses to me probably caused a few observers to look at them differently. One powerful example stands out to me even after twenty-five plus years.
Before I tell you about this act of kindness from days of old, let me set the scene. When this happened I was a very young teenager with the social skills of an okapi combined with a snapping turtle. If dictionaries used pictures to define the words “awkward” and “uncool”, my photo would have been used. Seriously, my style consisted of homemade clothes (sorry, mom), shoes from the Dollar Store, and hair always tightly pulled back. It was pretty sad, especially since I didn’t have to look this way; my sister certainly did not.
I’d like to say that I made up for all this with a stunning set of smarts, but I’d be lying. So, really, I had nothing much going for me when this older girl from school came on the scene. She was the coolest girl in school and very gifted in athletics, music, speech, and social skills.
She also had a streak of kindness.
Against all odds and all things 90’s cool, she chose to invite me to hang out with her. I’ll never forget how she chose to spend an evening with just me at a bookstore. Perhaps her mom put her up to it. I don’t know and I don’t care. She got out of the sphere of cool people around her to give an uncool girl a gift of kindness. Maybe her cool friends looked at her differently, negatively even, but I was beyond encouraged.
It’s My Turn Now
In my past I’ve experienced kindness and encouragement, and now, the responsibility is on me. Am I taking the encouragement that someone gave me years ago and passing it along to someone else?
Sometimes.
I hate to admit it but I struggle to be kind and encouraging, even with people I know well. In fact, there is one instance not so long ago when I knew God was prodding me to talk to a visitor at church and I outright said “no!” Looking back on moments like that I ask God for forgiveness, but still regret a potential missed opportunity.
Of course, I’ve had some victories in this area too. I love knowing that God can use even me to encourage another person. This is such a kindness of God.
Going forward, I want to grow more and more in this area of deliberate and sacrificial gifts of kindness. We all need more encouragement and we are all capable of giving it. Communication, time, physical gifts, or whatever else you can think of can all be sources of kind encouragement. And if we get to worrying that someone watching will start to think negatively about us, we should remember that we’re in good company.
Scriptures to Ponder:
And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.
Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.
Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.
A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver.
